When The Going Gets Tough Do You Quit... Or Do You Commit?
There comes a point in a coaching program where as a client you get tested.
Whether I’ve invested 100k or 1k this phenomena is the same. Something doesn’t work out as planned, or the universe throws a massive curve ball (getting accidentally pregnant 2 months into a 6 figure investment, anyone?) or you seem unable to make your installment, or you have the money but really feel you should spend it on Christmas presents or a new couch. Or maybe your significant other doesn’t get why you’re spending ‘all this money’ and every month you feel guilty and unsteady as you feel judged you’re not where you want to be yet.
I’ve experienced all of these and then some.
After having invested over $200k in my own development this last decade- and half of that in one chunk in the 2nd year of my business, i’ve gone pretty deep into this. I’ve wanted to quit, wanted to run, I’ve been terrified, I’ve resisted, and been face to face with my ‘stuff’ and been further out of my comfort zone than I thought was possible…
I occasionally have gone into deep terror- and as a result blamed myself or my coaches, projected, avoided and found faults on them or their work. (You tend to find whatever you’re looking for and if you can make someone else ‘wrong’ then you get to be right- and the ego loves to be right. It exists to be right…it feels temporarily better but ultimately means the belief in you that was being dislodged gets to deepen and ‘bed in’) You have to get past projections if you want to get your freedom…
So here’s the kicker…no matter how convinced you are that your struggle is ‘real’ it’s that very fight for the validation of it that’s keeping you stuck.
If you default on your payments and your program, if you give up then you give up on the transformation you’d committed to at the start, you give up on yourself.
No one else might know when you opt out on your self- but YOU know.
You know how it feels to choose yourself and your path and that what this ‘crisis’ actually is, is the gift for you to break the bondage of fear and step into the unknown and the potential within you. The only way through is through.
Diamonds get formed under an intense kind of pressure- your purpose is galvanizing you and you’d thought it was going to be a walk in the park and now here you are on your knees, questioning everything you thought you knew…
You’re actually in the birthing canal, don’t abandon yourself now.
Though you feel squeezed, uncomfortable, messy and raw - this is the other face of transformation and if you quit, nothing will change, no ‘god’ will jump off his cloud and tell you off but you just won’t get the breakthrough, and you’ll spend the next few years, even maybe decades at the same place until you muster the courage, strength and willingness to choose yourself again.
Or, you could just choose yourself now.
Look, I’m not the most brilliant business mind. I’m an ENFP- a dreamy artist with a Taurus sun and a cancer moon- which makes me prone to laziness, hypersensitivity and hugely resistant to change. But if I’ve done 2 things right in my last decade in business it’s this:
I stubbornly refused to quit- and that was mostly empowered by my second saving grace:
I ‘got’ that it was all a game, an illusion, a mirror :
If I don’t pay my mentor and hide from the program this month, who am I really hiding from? If I don’t become the woman who pays her bills and honours her commitments- who is going to want to learn anything from me and what kind of example am I setting if I can’t show up for myself?
If you attract clients who don’t show up, don’t pay, drop out on you or resist change you gotsta take a look at what that mirrors for you.
I’ve worked with amazing clients and I always strive to be an amazing client. I’ve dropped a few balls here and there over the last decade, that I’ve learned from, but I can honestly say when I commit to something and take a leap of faith in myself I:-
Make my payments
Stay in communication with my mentor
Do the work
Show up and share my success
Ask for support
Kick some ass, and then share with the world with an amazing testimonial for the value I’ve received.
I look for the value, and I find it every time- In bucket loads. I aim to be their best success story and model the kind of behaviour I like to attract in my own clients.
You have to be bigger than your fears to stand a chance in business.
You have to become the person others would invest in. And guess what?
You have to go first.
Invest in yourself and commit in a way that is scarier than what you know you’re here to do deep down, and then you’ll stop resisting and get yourself over the line.
Many times the biggest scariest commitments I’ve made weren’t about content or teachings or what my mind ‘thought’ I’d ‘get’ but they were about getting out of my own damn way and demonstrating radically that I was believing in myself and taking a stand for my ability to earn money and pay it to someone else for seeing me, supporting me and encouraging me to go for it.
There’s nothing like a few zeroes to scare the crap out of yourself and get you finishing that book, contacting that scary person, raising your prices or doing the thing.
This winter, whilst that couch does look pretty, make sure to take some time and money and make decisions that will set you up for the next decade. I invested in myself a decade ago in the midst of a double dip recession on a credit card and I thank God every day I did!
You can’t take any of it with you, only your soul’s growth in this lifetime, and if I’d always made the choice from fear I wouldn’t have any of what I most treasure in my life now:
Being able to do my own thing and have a lifestyle I enjoy
Watching my kids grow up and not needing to miss out on their childhood
The incredible people I’ve had the honour of working with and serving
The countries I’ve had the pleasure of visiting with my business
The priceless moments of miracles when it really lands for a client that she is an author, or a mother, or a millionaire- when that dream settles into form and we witness it together, after seeing her journey- that’s a feeling I can’t describe and can’t put a price on except to say I feel like one of the luckiest people on earth to be living my soul’s mission and feeling so close to God with my work...
I could go on as to the many many blessings- but I’ll stop there as it’s getting kinda long.
Suffice to say, you are worth sticking with through the grit.
You are worth the fight.
You are worth going the distance for.
Love yourself and see yourself … I’m cheering you on to take another step and claim your worth and your desires, when they seem impossible that’s exactly the moment you must ‘bear down’ and stand your ground.
You’ll be holding your dream in your hand before you know it
Leave me a comment below if this resonated for you and join me to take a stand for your greatness. If you’re struggling to attract high value, committed clients I highly recommend downloading my free audio that you can find here - it rewires your subconscious brain so you believe that you’re worth it and if you listen t it twice a day you’ll experience miracles in this area!